**TRIGGER WARNING** Suicide discussion to follow.
My apologies for such a heavy topic so early on a Tuesday. I saw this on one of my veteran's groups and thought it was too good not to share.
Not my writing, but I fully agree.
Take care of yourselves, and each other.
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It was about this time, nearly 8 years ago, that I walked in on a friend as he was attempting to kill himself.
For a solid min we just stared at each other. He broke the silence and said "dont try and stop me, Ive been thinking about this for a long time".
"I'm not going to", I replied.
He tilted his head, confused.
'See. No one cares!', he yelled, as tears started to pour down his face.
I still didnt know what words to say. I just stood there.
And then I remembered Kristie. She was a friend of mine that caught me in a similar situation.
I had to clear the lump in my throat and muster up my voice.
"Ok. I cant stop you, but can we just make sure things are done right?"
"What??? What are you talking about" he screams at me.
"Alright, just hang on a sec. We need to make sure some things are done" ... and somehow 3 hours passed.
You see in those 180 minutes, I got him to basically plan out his funeral, expenses, payments for apartment, list who gets what from his 'estate', and all the things that happen when someones dies.
He got mad at me, throwing the sheets of papers he angrily started cussing at me, telling me I was just stalling the inevitable.
All I could reply was "No, I just dont want your family suffering any more than they need to".
And right about then, he looked at the papers hed thrown and saw all the names he wrote.
Mom gets .... Uncle Alan gets.. Jared gets..Dad gets... Silva gets..Daman gets... my bank account goes to Aunt Lisa to pay my stuff off...Hope gets..Aunt Di gets....my dog goes to...the fish goes to....
And it hit him. All these people affected. All these people who were a part of his life.
And he cried. I stood there, hoping like hell he understood he wasnt alone.
I braced for whatever was about to happen as he picked up the papers and walked towards me.
He handed me the gun, walked passed me, and into the house.
Showing his family what he had written.
And everyone broke down.
They didnt know. He didnt know that they didnt see it. Noone knew anything.
But that day they learned. ...and he learned.
And right now I hope you've learned some things.
You arent alone.
Your death will affect much more than you realize.
You do matter.
Things can change and get better, you just have to let people know you need them.
This holiday season, if you find yourself feeling alone, I ask only one thing...... let someone know.
Dont know who?
I'm just a click away. I'll find you people to circle the wagons around you. I'll lead the charge to get you thru.
I made that promise to help to Kristie when she brought me back....and she made that promise to her friend who saved her....who had promised the lady who saved him.
The circle grows each time we reach out. Like a ripple.....
More people know..more people help..more people are here.
#CircleUp