Posts by Tech_Rick

  • Got pulled over for no helmet in Virginia.

    No ticket, and I did not get shot. Actually, the police were really nice about it (Fairfax PD). Of course I had my license, insurance and registration in order, and my helmet was in the vehicle with me. They just told me that I must wear one in Virginia. I had been going without one on surface streets, and only wearing the helmet when on the freeway, but now I'll wear it any time I drive the Slingshot. Both cops also spent some time checking out the Slingshot, talking to me about it, and asking questions. They seemed like really good guys.

  • Saturday morning in the Slingshot - a much shorter story......

    I was driving the Slingshot Saturday morning before the Skyline Drive meet, thinking about breakfast….. well, wait. Let me back up a bit. There’s some back-story that you need to know so that this will all make sense.


    Near my apartment there’s a pet store that’s a bit unusual. The store owner has rented out a space inside the store to a nice, older Chinese woman who set up a small coffee bar. I don’t know what the woman’s Chinese name is, but for her American name she chose “Honey” (everyone just calls her “Hun”). This name is fitting, I think, because in addition to having great coffee, she sells the BEST freshly made honey buns I’ve ever eaten. I doubt she makes them herself, but she will never tell me where she gets them. This “coffee bar inside the pet store” idea seems to work very well. People are almost always sitting in there with their pets, drinking coffee and chatting. I usually stop in at least once or twice a week, even though I don’t have any pets.


    (Stay with me here - I promise I'm going somewhere with all of this.)

    This past Thursday, my co-worker Robert was going out of town for a meeting and asked me to take care of Draco, his four-foot-long pet snake, while he was gone. I agreed because I’ve never had any fear of snakes and I thought it would be cool to have one for a week. When I went over to Robert’s place Thursday evening to pick the snake up, he told me that Draco had just eaten a rabbit the previous night, so I wouldn’t have to worry about feeding him. However, Saturday morning I was out driving my Slingshot and passed by the pet store and I thought, “it would be cool to stop and get Draco a live feeder rat, so I can see how he eats live prey. And while I’m there, it’s an excuse to get a honey bun!”

    Wooohooo! My plan was set and my stomach started to rumble in anticipation! I whipped the Slingshot into the parking lot and, after waiting a minute for a guy to leave, backed into one of the front parking spots in front of the pet store. As I entered the store I told Julie, the sales girl, that I needed a feeder rat for a pet snake, then I made a bee-line for the coffee bar.

    “Ni hao Hun, can I get a regular coffee and one honey bun please”, I said as I approached the bar. “Ni hao Mr. Rick,” Honey said, “you too late today. All buns already sold. I no get more until tomorrow.” I was heartbroken. I had my mouth all ready for a delicious honey bun, and now I wouldn’t get one. My disappointment must have shown on my face because Honey said “I sorry Mr. Rick. Tomorrow I save one for you. You come back at any time tomorrow”.

    I moped back towards the front doors thinking about how good that honey bun would have been. “I’ve got your feeder rat ready” Julie said to me as I approached the front counter. “Sorry Julie”, I told her, “change of plans. I’m sure that Draco wouldn’t want his feeder rat knowing that I couldn’t get my honey bun. I’ll try again tomorrow.” “No problem” Julie said. “We’ll see you tomorrow then.”

    As I’m climbing back into the Slingshot to leave, it occurred to me what I should have said: "My anaconda don’t want none unless you got buns, Hun".










    (I’ll let myself out….)


  • A guy totals his Slingshot and I learn that enunciation is REALLY important.

    A couple of years ago, soon after the Slingshot was introduced, I was heavily infected with Slingshot lust. I really wanted one and I was always gushing on and on about them to my (now ex) girlfriend Rachel. She thought they looked cool, but she was not on-board with the idea of buying one. Especially after the little episode I'm about to relate to you. Rachel worked in the surgery unit in a large hospital. She came home one day and I asked how her day was. As I recall, the conversation went as follows:


    Rachel: "It was great! You know those Polish Sling-thingies you like?


    Rick: “Polaris Slingshot. Yeah, what about them?”


    Rachel: "Well, I was first surgical assist on this guy that was life-flighted in after an accident in one of those."


    Rick: "He wrecked a Slingshot?"


    Rachel: “Yeah, totaled it is what we heard.”


    Rick: "Oh, Man! I hope he was okay."


    Rachel: "He'll live, but we had to do a baloney amputation on him. It was my first time assisting on one of those. Really interesting."


    Rick: "OHHHH!! A BALONEY amputation?!? I don't want to hear about that! Why would you tell me that?!"


    [At this point, I was a bit offended by Rachel's use of slang terminology for this procedure, but I let it go.]


    Rachel: "What? It's not all that uncommon. He'll get a prosthetic and he'll live a pretty much normal life."


    Rick: "WHAT?! A prosthetic for that?! WHY? So his girlfriend will still be happy?"


    Rachel: "His girlfriend?? Ummm...I think she'd be okay with it. I wouldn't care if you had a baloney prosthetic."


    Rick: "STOP!! I don't want to think about that!"


    Rachel: "Dude it’s not that bad! The technology for prosthetics has really advanced. After he gets used to it, it will probably even feel normal to him. And no one else will even know he has it unless he shows them....or, I guess if he's wearing shorts..."


    Rick: "FEEL NORMAL? How could it feel normal to....Wait... It'll show if he's wearing shorts? How long is the thing!?"


    Rachel: "Well, each one is custom fit, but his will be about 36 centimeters."


    Rick: "In inches. How many inches is that?"


    Rachel: "Just over 14 inches."


    Rick: "STFU!!! Bullshit! Why would they make it 14 freakin' inches long?! His girlfriend's idea? I'm sure she would be happy with that!"


    Rachel: "Well, it has to be the same length as what we removed or he'll have trouble walking, and it could mess up his spinal alignment and cause back problems."


    Rick: [Rendered temporarily speechless, with a look of stunned disbelief on my face.]


    Rick: "OK......I get it.... you're messing with me. You're messing with me."


    Rachel: "What are you talking about? I'm not messing with you."


    Rick: "You are, because nobody's got a 14 inch dick. And nobody needs a 14 inch prosthetic replacement dick. And shouldn't you use the correct terminology? Shouldn't you call it a 'penile amputation' or something like that and not a 'baloney amputation'? That's just crude. Why do girls always have to go there??"


    Rachel: [Absorbs what I just said for a moment with blank face.] Then:


    Rachel: "AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! YOU'RE [gasp] SO [gasp] AHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! YOU'RE SO STUPID!! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!"


    Rick: "Why are you laughing?! It's not funny!"


    Rachel: "AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! 'baloney amputation' [gasp] SO [gasp]AHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! SO [gasp] STUPID!! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!"


    Rick: "What The Hell?! Why is this funny to you? The guy lost his dick, Rachel. That’s not funny – women always want to make jokes about that but it’s not funny!"


    Rachel: "OMG you're an [gasp] idiot! Hahahahahaha! I wasn't saying 'baloney amputation'! I was saying 'below knee amputation'. We amputated his leg below the knee! Hahahahaha! Why do guys always have to go there?!"


    Rick: Oh... Well..... ENUNCIATION, Rachel. You need to enunciate.


    Rachel: “Hahahahahaha!” [Imitating me with a deep voice] “ENUNCIATION, Rachel. You need to enunciate so I don’t think that a guy got his junk cut off from a Slingshot accident”.


    Also Rachel: [For the next 4 hours] "Hahahahahaha!!! Hahahahahaha!Hahahahaha!"

  • Install Projector / Puddle lights INSIDE the OEM mirrors.

    Quote from rabtech

    My Ford Raptor has them under it's mirrors and they are super bright.

    The ones I have are meant to go on the bottom edge of a car door panel, so they're suppose to be much closer to the ground than I have them. They still focus ok, but as a result of their higher mounting location they are dimmer and project a larger image than they ordinarily would. In the photos I posted, the area surrounding the "SS" symbol appears MUCH more blue than it does to the naked eye.

  • Install Projector / Puddle lights INSIDE the OEM mirrors.

    This project was actually not too difficult at all. Because of the way the lights mount, it is not necessary to disassemble the mirrors (you don't need to remove the glass). All you have to do is take the mirrors off of the Slingshot to work on them. There is plenty of room behind the glass to install the lights and the mirror still is able to move around just as freely as before the install.



    Here you can see where I drilled the mounting hole with the hole saw that came with the lights. I wanted to get as far to the outside and as far to the front as I could. This took some guesswork but the location shown works well.




    The projector/puddle light pushes into the hole from the outside. This is what allows it to be installed without disassembling the mirror. Once you feed the wiring through the hole, there is a retainer nut that you’ll need to thread onto the wiring and then over the light housing once it is installed in the mirror. This sounds harder than it is – the nut really can’t go anywhere other than where it’s supposed to go because the wiring is threaded through it.



    Screw the retainer nut down (there is enough room to fit some needle-nosed pliers under the mirror glass if you push the top of the glass all the way back. I could even fit my pinky finger in there to turn the nut.) NOTE that the retainer nut is tapped on one side for a set screw. You want to arrange it so that this is facing the front, so you can put the set screw in when you’re ready.



    Here you can see the light housing installed, retainer nut on, and set screw set. Once I had the retainer nut finger tight, I used a 9-volt battery to light up the light. This is so I could make sure it was oriented the way I wanted it to be. I reached in with needle-nosed pliers and turned the light housing to where I wanted it to be. When I had it where I wanted it, I installed the set screw.




    At this point, I drilled a hole on the bottom inside of the mirror housing for the wiring to exit the housing. It can be a bit tricky to get the wire through this hole, but it's doable.



    Here's the mirror with the light installed and the wiring zip-tied into place.



    The projector/puddle light pretty much looks like an OEM installation. After both lights are completed, just wire them to your auxiliary fuse box (I set mine to come on when the key is on), and you're set. Don't forget to loom and tie up your wiring if you want a professional, clean look.



    As you can see, this effect is very noticeable at night, however, they can't be seen at all in the daylight. I only included the photo of the driver's side light because where I was parked, the passenger side light was shining onto grass and wasn't really readable, but both sides look the same on pavement.


  • Yet another long Slingshot story. Or, "how I got free medicine at CVS".

    Inside the CVS I found the Benadryl easily, and didn’t bother to wait until I had paid for it. I just opened it up right there in the aisle and started swigging. I had wondered as I was opening the box if I would be able to swallow with my tongue swelling like it was, but I needn’t have worried. I could swallow just fine and I could even taste the cherry flavor of the medicine, although it felt like those cherries were on fire.


    “Hey!” I heard a loud male voice yell from behind me. I turned and saw a CVS guy heading straight for me. I held up my hand in a “stop” gesture and was about to explain that I intended to pay for the Benadryl when he said “What the hell did you say to Cheryl”?!?


    I was thoroughly confused. “Whaa? Who?”


    He pointed behind him and standing at the end of the aisle was Cheryl, the ridiculously pretty girl, with a look on her face that was about 20 miles past pissed off. “Did you tell her to sit on your tongue!?! That’s my brother’s girlfriend! You don’t speak to her like that!”


    “Whaa?” I said. “”Thit on my tongue?” Then it occurred to me what had happened. She had misunderstood me due to the swelling. I burst out laughing, which was an amazing thing considering how much pain I was in.


    “Oh, you think this is funny? I ought to kick the shit out of you, you asshole!”


    I held up my hand in a “stop” gesture again and said “wait, thath not…. AHAHAHAHA….” I was laughing too hard to try to talk, and even if I weren’t laughing, I still probably couldn’t speak well enough to explain. I sounded like I was about 15 marshmallows ahead of my competition in a game of Chubby Bunny. That thought just made me laugh all-the-harder. I actually said “Chubby Bunny” to see what it would sound like. I was bent over, holding my stomach, bellowing out laughter now. I had tears in my eyes and I needed to pee.


    “What the hell is WRONG with you, man?!” the CVS guy asked with a look on his face that actually bordered on concern.


    After a minute I got control of myself. I held up an index finger [wait gesture], I pointed to my mouth and then did a small, palm-out wave with my hand [I can’t speak gesture], then I held out my left palm and made a writing motion on it with my right hand. I wanted to find a pen and pad, but then it occurred to me that I didn’t need to write. I had my phone in my pocket, so I could type. I showed the guy my phone and then started to type.


    “Didn’t say ‘sit on my tongue’. I said ‘stung on my tongue’. Yellowjacket stung me. Can’t speak!”


    I showed him the Samsung Galaxy S8+ and suddenly he was the one laughing. I looked up towards the end of the aisle and the look on Cheryl’s face had gone from "anger" to "anger with a big dose of confusion". She started walking towards us, evidently curious to know what I had typed that would cause her boyfriend’s brother to betray her like this. That got me going again, so now the CVS guy and I were both looking at Cheryl and laughing. She did not seem pleased by this new development.


    “Cheryl, you idiot!” the CVS guy said through his laughter. Cheryl had reached us and snatched the phone out of the CVS guy’s hand. Her face went blank as she read what I’d written. “Oh my GOD! I’m SOOO sorry!” she said. She rushed over and hugged me. “I’m so sorry” she said again. Then we were all three laughing.


    After a minute, Cheryl’s mothering instinct apparently kicked in because she looked at me and said “wait, wait, let me see your tongue”. I opened my mouth and tried to stick out my tongue, but it didn’t seem to want to cooperate. I couldn’t move it around or manipulate it like I normally could. “OH MY GOD!” Cheryl screamed. “Oh. Oh. Oh!” She grabbed my hand “what do you have? Lemme see!” she asked, and upon seeing the Benadryl she shoved it towards my face. “Yes. Drink more. You need more!”


    I drank more.


    After a while I was finally able to convince Cheryl and Mark (the CVS guy) that I was going to be ok. It seemed that the swelling had subsided a little, or at least it stopped getting worse. I could still breath fine because it was only the front two thirds of my tongue that was swollen. Mark gave me the Benadryl for free as an apology for the misunderstanding and I left the CVS and went over to the McDonalds. I wanted to sit for a while and make sure that the Benadryl wouldn’t affect me to the point that I couldn’t drive. (I didn’t want to explain what happened again, so I just typed out “dental work – can’t speak. Large drink please” on my phone and showed it to the McDonalds girl.) I had already eaten a short time before this drama began so I just got a large tea with lots of ice, and I held the ice in my mouth as long as I could to try to help the swelling.


    About 45 minutes later I was convinced that I would be fine. I climbed back into the Slingshot and continued my drive home. I was in pain the ENTIRE way, and for much of the evening.


    So, if you are driving your Slingshot and feel the need to yawn, COVER your mouth!

  • Yet another long Slingshot story. Or, "how I got free medicine at CVS".

    Sunday was such a nice day that I decided to drive the Slingshot down to Ocean City, Maryland. For the most part, it was a great ride. I made it to Ocean City, had lunch, walked on the Boardwalk, drove around on the strip, had about 10,000 photos taken of the Slingshot, etc., etc., etc… It would have been a great day overall if not for a little incident that happened on the ride back. Let me tell you about that…..

    I was about 2 hours into my 3-hour drive back home when it happened. I was cruising along at around 65 mph and I was starting to feel a bit tired. It was at this point that I made the mistake of yawning. Normally I will cover my mouth when I yawn, but this time I didn’t. I don’t know why I didn’t. But I didn’t. And I SHOULD HAVE.

    So, what happens when you pop open the “blender of random chance”, throw in a nice summer day, an open-mouthed yawn, a speeding Polaris Slingshot, and then hit the “puree” button? Well, what happens is that Murphy’s Law walks up and junk-punches you, that’s what happens. Just as I got to the apex of the yawn – mouth open to its widest potential – Murphy’s law added its own special little ingredient to the mix.

    There was an impact and a small explosion on the driver’s side upper edge of the wind screen. This was followed immediately by a lesser, secondary impact on my tongue and then the roof of my open mouth. The secondary impact was followed by an intense burning sensation on my tongue. “WTF?!” I thought as I tucked my head down and spit a foreign object out onto my lap. “OWWWW!”

    I looked down to see what I had just spit out. There it was lying on my left Levi’s 501 pant leg. Still twitching. A smooth, glossy, black and yellow striped insect abdomen, complete with insect guts hanging out of the top part. “AWWWW SHIT!!!” I said out loud. (In retrospect, I think that my tongue was already starting to swell at that point, because I think I heard myself say “AWWWW THIT!!!”.) So, a yellow jacket had hit the windshield, exploded, and then the business-end of this little pain machine had flown right into my open mouth. If you are like me and didn’t know that yellow jackets could still sting even after they have exploded, now you know. They CAN. This dismembered abdomen had stung me at least once right on the top of my tongue, near the tip.

    To my own credit, I didn’t so much as swerve the Slingshot as this event unfolded. I held my lane and my speed. “Pwetty thafe dwiving, all thinght conthidered” I said to myself. “UH OH.”

    After recovering from the initial shock of this drama, the pain in my tongue really started to set in. Also, I was starting to feel the swelling start. I was thinking fast at this point. “Hmmmm… I don’t think I’m allergic to stings, but this is right on my tongue. How much is it going to swell? Will it affect my breathing? Shit, I don’t know.” I recalled a scene from the movie “Hitch” where Will Smith’s character eats shellfish (he’s allergic to it) and his face swells up horribly. He goes to a pharmacy to get an anti-histamine to combat the swelling. “Good idea. I’d better stop and get some Benadryl” I thought to myself.

    In an incredibly lucky turn-of-events, just as I’m thinking that I need Benadryl, I look up and see a CVS pharmacy ahead on the right. “Wow! At least this happened at the right place” I thought. I put on my right blinker and begin to brake and down-shift the Slingshot. Pulling into the CVS parking lot, I saw a ridiculously pretty girl walking out of the pharmacy’s front door. I wanted to stop and stare for a minute, but I thought better of it – what with my developing medical emergency and all. So, I parked the Slingshot and went through my procedure of getting out – key off, gearshift in reverse, parking brake on, seat belt off, helmet off, and ball cap on to hide my helmet-hair.

    I was climbing out and really feeling the pain and swelling in my tongue when I heard an angelically sweet little voice say, “That’s really cool! What is it?” I turned and saw the ridiculously pretty girl standing there looking at the Slingshot. She was a blond twenty-something. About 5’7”, tiny-waisted and top-heavy, wearing tight jeans, a t-shirt, and a ball cap with a ponytail pulled through the back. I was immediately torn between wanting to talk to her about the Slingshot and wanting to go into the CVS and get the possibly life-saving medication that I needed in order to survive. What to do… what to do….. I chose life.

    I needed medicine, but I didn’t want to be rude to her, so I pointed to my mouth and said “”tharwy, thung on my tongue”. The effect it had on her was immediate. He eyes opened wide and her mouth dropped open. Then anger flashed onto her face. “that’s disgusting, you jerk” she said, and stomped off towards the center of the parking lot. “What the heck?”, I wondered to myself. I guessed that I looked and sounded so horrible that it freaked her out a bit. “I’d better get that Benadryl quick”.

  • New poll: Which would you rather have:

    Quote from KayTwo

    Does that include all future pictures and questions? LOL

    No. Only the ones taken so far, but keep in mind, this does include ALL photos taken even when you weren't around (like, when you were in the restaurant eating, or in the store shopping, and people took a photo of the Sling in the parking lot. We're assuming that the number can be magically known.)