• Tracking a UPS package that’s supposed to arrive today. I am extremely impressed with their new high speed technology! Albuquerque is 225 miles north of me (& obviously in the same time zone). Somehow, the package made this leg of the trip in 16 minutes! Impressive stuff...

    Slingshots: making children out of adults since 2014

  • Your English lesson for today.... Homographs are words of like spelling but with more than one meaning. A homograph that is also pronounced differently is a heteronym. I think a retired English teacher was bored...
    1) The bandage was *wound* around the *wound*.
    2) The farm was used to *produce produce*.
    3) The dump was so full that it had to *refuse* more *refuse*.
    4) We must *polish* the *Polish* furniture.
    5) He could *lead*if he would get the *lead* out.
    6) The soldier decided to *desert* his dessert in the *desert*.
    7) Since there is no time like the *present*, he thought it was time to *present* the *present*.
    8) A *bass* was painted on the head of the *bass* drum.
    9) When shot at, the *dove dove *into the bushes.
    10) I did not *object* to the *object*.
    11) The insurance was *invalid* for the *invalid*
    12) There was a *row* among the oarsmen about how to *row*.
    13) They were too *close* to the door to *close* it.
    14) The buck *does* funny things when the *does* are present.
    15) A seamstress and a *sewer* fell down into a *sewer* line.
    16) To help with planting, the farmer taught his *sow* to *sow*.
    17) The *wind* was too strong to *wind* the sail.
    18) Upon seeing the *tear* in the painting I shed a *tear*.
    19) I had to *subject* the *subject* to a series of tests.
    20) How can I *intimate* this to my most *intimate* friend?

    There is no egg in eggplant, nor ham in hamburger; neither apple nor pine in a pineapple. English muffins weren't invented in England or French fries in France. Sweetmeats are candies while sweetbreads, which aren't sweet, are meat. We take English for granted. But if we explore its paradoxes, we find that quicksand can work slowly, boxing rings are square and a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig And why is it that writers write but fingers don't fing, grocers don't groce and hammers don't ham?
    If the plural of tooth is teeth, why isn't the plural of booth, beeth? One goose, 2 geese. So one moose, 2 meese? One index, 2 indices? Doesn't it seem crazy that you can make amends but not one amend?
    If you have a bunch of odds and ends and get rid of all but one of them, what do you call it?
    If teachers taught, why didn't preachers praught? If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat?
    Sometimes I think all the English speakers should be committed to an asylum for the verbally insane. In what language do people recite at a play and play at a recital? Ship by truck and send cargo by ship? Have noses that run and feet that smell? How can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same, while a wise man and a wise guy are opposites? You have to marvel at the unique lunacy of a language in which your house can burn up as it burns down, in which you fill in a form by filling it out and in which, an alarm goes off by going on.

    English was invented by people, not computers, and it reflects the creativity of the human race, which, of course, is not a race at all. That is why, when the stars are out, they are visible, but when the lights are out, they are invisible.
    Why doesn't 'Buick' rhyme with 'quick'? AND If a male goat is called a ram and a donkey is called an ass, why is a ram-in-the-ass called a goose

  • That was enjoyable @BryanL.

    While my *Honey* was at the *store* to pick up some *honey*, I told her to get some storage containers to *store* some *stuff*. She told me she also had to get some cotton to *stuff* a pillow. I said, "Ok, *Awesome* ! Well I'm just pulling *up* to work, I hope I can make it *up* the driveway. It has an *awesome* *grade*. I'm sure what *ever* you grab will meet the *grade*, I've known you forever and *ever* and you always do well". :thumbsup:

  • For some reason, I'm having a hard time believing that isn't photoshop. If you were gonna transport something like that (and *what* would that even be for?), wouldn't you have to cover it? Otherwise, I would think it would be some kind of charge for indecent exposure or lewdness, or something...

    And putting a giant condom on it is supposed to help out how, exactly?! :D

    Slingshots: making children out of adults since 2014