I'm sure most of you have seen the news about Eugene Cole, a deputy in ME who was gunned down on the job a few days ago. He was from Norridgewock, Maine. Some of you might have been there before. There ain't much there. I used to hunt and fish with my dad all over that country. I know there's crime and a plethora of bad people everywhere, but....Norridgewock? Seriously?
So, anyway, Deputy Cole's widow posted this on FB, and it moved me. I know some of you don't FB, so I thought I'd share.
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Tuesday afternoon at around 2:30, Gene got up from his recliner and told me he had to had to get ready for work-he was on duty at 4:00. (He was always ready for work at least an hour early….in case he was “called out”.) He scuffled into the bathroom. With-in 2 minutes, he was back in his chair, using his electric razor and shaving his face. He knows how much it annoyed me when he did this - and he did it every single day. Yet, he would look at me with an expression of fake shock on his face while I was glaring at him, and say “What?”, as if he didn’t know. Then he’d continue to shave, and place the razor on the end table beside his chair. (something else that really annoyed me.) In a few minutes, he’d headed back to the bathroom to shower. He then continued to get ready, putting on his vest, putting on his uniform, making sure all his brass was just so, and pulling on his ever-so-shiny boots. He’d check himself in the mirror several times before telling me, “Okay, Hon. I gotta go.” He gave miss a hug and kiss goodbye, and said “I love you.” I said, “Really? Your just gonna leave that razor sitting on the stand in the living room?! That’s gross!” He would just tell me he’d put it away later. I told him I loved him and to be safe, as I did everyday, and his response, as it is everyday - “Absolutely.”
I watched him and waved as he drove away. My thoughts quickly went to the razor. I started to pick it up and put it away, but thought - no. A 61 year old man should not need someone to pick up after him. I left it there.
Sometime between 6 and 6:30 Gene returned home for a few minutes. He talked about the full moon and how it brought all the “crazies” out. We talked a little, and abruptly he’d give me a hurried kiss and say he had to go. On his way out, he spotted the razor still sitting where he left it, and gave me a look like he just got caught with his hand in the cookie jar. Anyway, we said our ritual goodbye, ending with me saying (or yelling ) “Be safe.” and him responding “Absolutely.”
The next time I saw my husband, he was laying in a casket.
The last five days have been the purest form of hell and torture. The waiting when they couldn’t find his body, the finality when they did, and the uncertainty of the days that followed.
The overwhelming support has been phenomenal. From a kind total stranger knocking on my door and saying, “You don’t know me, but I knew him.” (She gave some flowers and a quick hug, and left.) to the massive outpouring of public support. It is truly humbling, and I need you all to know that it really has helped. I spend most of my alone time reading any and all posts regarding Gene, and reading every word of every article in the paper. (The Morning Sentinel has been kind enough to deliver the paper to my house every morning, even though I don’t have a subscription - which is pretty awesome, considering when they came to my house, I rudely and loudly told them to go away.) As I said, I read everything. I have read every single word. As sad it makes me, and how hard it is to read through tears, it touches my heart and gives it that tiny lift it so desperately needs right now. So to you all - a heartfelt thank you.
To everyone who has donated their services - and so many of you have. You may think it’s just a tiny gesture. That it’s “the least you can do”. Believe me, to me and my family, it’s the greatest gift we could ever receive. So to you all - a heartfelt thank you.
And Law Enforcement. Words haven’t been invented yet to even come close to describing what they’ve done for me. I managed to get myself (with my son, Joe, by my side) to the command post Thursday evening. I tried to personally thank each and every person...and I hope I got most of them….but I was blown away by how many were there! So many! And they were all there, working diligently, for my husband. When I couldn’t speak, Sheriff Dale Lancaster spoke for me. He got their attention, and within seconds that place went from a bustling center of desperate activity to complete silence. I tried to speak, to tell them all how truly heartfelt my appreciation was, and I’m still not sure if anything came out. Once again, on Saturday morning, I went to the command post with my son, David. Again, I thanked everyone I could get my hands on as David led me out back, disrupting a meeting, so I could talk to the Sheriff. The Sheriff saw me, put the meeting on hold, and came immediately to see what I needed. And he took care of it.
My son, David, has been a bulldozer this week. He is always going before me, clearing the path, so when I walk through, there are no obstacles. Absolutely incredible. My other kids- Phil, Joe, and Jill, have been there every minute (a couple times I’ve had to kick them out!) I know they are going through so much heartache, but they - David included - have managed to sit with me through my “bitch” days…..and those days can be pretty awful. So-thanks guys! Joe’s wife Laurie has been great, thinking of everything I need before I know I need it.
There are so, so many people whom I need to thank, (including the media, who have respectfully left me alone during this) and there’s no way it could possibly be done here. But you know who are, and hopefully I will get to you eventually. It will never be forgotten.
I am the wife of Corporal Eugene Cole. I am not a widow (I always told him the “til death do us part” thing wasn’t going to get him out of anything). I am not a victim. With the help and support of my family, my community, and my country, I will get through this. I have to adjust to what will become the new normal. When you look at me, you may see the sorrow in my eyes, the reflection of a gold badge with the number 1312 across it. I have to remember every Law Enforcement officer in this country has lost a brother. I will ask all of you to please give all the officers the respect they deserve, thank them when you can. Let their families know the sacrifices they make are greatly appreciated. For me, I will always proudly be the wife of Somerset County Sheriff’s Corporal Eugene Cole. I will hold my head high as I work my way through this. When I’m home, alone or with family, where Gene is simply a husband, dad, and Bampi, I will mourn, maybe forever. I know he was many great things to a great many people, but - to me - he was mine. May you rest in peace, my husband, my best friend. You are loved.
Let your brothers in blue, black, brown tan, or green take it from here.
Corporal Eugene Cole - End of Watch 4/25/2018
